He Asked His Wife

He asked his wife, “Will you miss me when I’m

gone?” She responded, “Of course I will.”

It wasn’t exactly the response he had in mind.

He envisioned, “What! Gone! Never! But if you were

destined for death we would go through it together,

darling. Like the president of Union Theological

Seminary, New York and his wife many years ago

who realizing the decline of one or both decided to

end life together, ah romantically, ah, so romantic-

ally.” But she opted for that which is so much more

realistic, and he scooped from the burlwood bowl

another handful of buttered and salted popcorn she

had popped in soy oil in the new Emeril five quart

sauce pan on the electric glass top Frigidaire stove.

They continued watching “Masterpiece Mystery”

while he sipped the bargain pinot grigio.