I just read that
Bach drank thirty-

six cups of coffee
a day and then I

understood why Bach’s
music moves so fast.

I heard in college
English that Balzac

drank himself to
death on coffee

but I can’t hear
how fast he wrote

the words. I wonder
if Balzac committed

slow suicide by
coffee, making his

brain move faster
and faster and

faster till it
was the little

engine that could-
n’t? Maybe it helped

Bach father lots
and lots of kids

really fast. Maybe
he was composing

his feisty fugues
fueled by the

caffeine at
conception.

Considering both
alternatives,

I think I’ll
pass on the

next cup of
coffee.