She painted flowers in watercolors.
She said, “Listen to this. I have
looked these up and I might include
this information in the paintings.
Ivory Rose is charm, Peach Rose is
modesty, Pink Rose is grace, Hydrangea –
heartfelt emotion, Myrtle – love and
joy, Phlox – harmony and good partner-
ship,” He roused himself from his
stupor and exclaimed, “Get the Phlox
out! Oh, how I have wanted to yell
that from the pulpit.” Then he laughed
at his own lame humor. She wasn’t im-
pressed, “So much for harmony and good
partnership. Clematis – mental art,
beauty.” “Clematis!” he exclaimed. “Is
that a combination of climax and chlamydia.”
“What is that?” she asked. “Never mind.”
“Finally, periwinkle – everlasting love
and purity.” Now he sits and opens
sympathy e-cards with sad organ music
and bouquets of flowers and he recites
the meaning of as many as he can
remember, which isn’t many.
There are no jokes.