Ongoing Work Just When You Thought You Had It Licked

The therapist said, “I want you to
envision her as she was. Give me
a physical description.” “Little,
shriveled, pinched.” “And why
does she hold such power over
you?” “Lack of acceptance, lack
of affirmation, lack of demonstrable
love.” “She’s gone.” “Well, not really.”
“She’s occupying way too much of
your space.” And they went on with
it. And now he has to remind himself
that she isn’t his wife when his wife
says something that triggers the
negativity. “Yes,” he thinks his
therapist would have said, “Remind
yourself. You don’t want anymore mis-
placed aggression in your life. Besides,
your wife is a beautiful, affirming
person who just happens to be human.
And furthermore, it isn’t any good for
your blood pressure.” And with that
memory, he let out a deep sigh.

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