Because he wanted the twenty-one bucks,
this is what they went through in this
wonderful, technologically sophisticated
age: the check sat lonely, unattended,
isolated and ignored for nine whole months.
When those snowbirds flew into Phoenix
and retrieved it from their mailbox, of
course it was beyond the viable ninety
day limit for cashing. The wife said,
“I’ll just shred it.” The husband of Dutch
descent, protested, “Twenty-one bucks
is twenty-one bucks. Happy hour here
we come.” So she called; they
got the twenty-one bucks and shortly
thereafter, the cable service was dis-
connected, in fact, cancelled. What?
True. Why? After hours waiting for
someone at the cable company to
pick up the phone, a real human female
from Rochester, New York did answer.
She said she was going to put them on
hold to find out what had happened and
she and the conversation just went away.
The familiar sound of the recorded message
once again rang in his ear. He pushed #3
on the cell phone again, waited for
another eternity and finally another real human
female answered. She was from Arizona. For
some reason he started singing “Take
It Easy” by the Eagles into the phone.
He was running down the road trying
to lighten his load. The real human female
laughed. He almost cried while the
bars of the battery of his phone started
to disappear from phone fatigue. He told
the story all over again. The real human
female then declared that a reconnect
charge and a deposit would be required
to get the cable connection up and going
thus far exceeding the twenty-one buck
refund from nine months ago. He still
wanted to know why the disconnect.
Just a technologically sophisticated
glitch the real human female from the
company guessed. The reissue of
check for twenty-one bucks must have
triggered the computer generated action.
He didn’t think he should have to pay
for a computer glitch. The real human
female from Phoenix on the other end of
the line just sat in silence. He could hear
her loud and clear: “Hey, Glenn Frey
wannabe, do you want the connection
or not?” He pulled out his credit
card. His wife just stared at him
as he went to recharge the cell